Parenting – The real deal

 

If you google the definition of parenting you will find this – “The activity of bringing up a child as a parent” –  I laughed when I read this today as it is about as far removed as to what parenting really is as you can get ! I know I am only 5 years into this parenting lark but I have learnt so much already yet I still know so very little, but what I do know is that parenting is so intense and at times feels never ending . I do have to laugh when people say oh the nights are long but the years are short , and yes , the years fly by BUT if you are in the middle of the intense no sleep , teething , colic , never ending feeding stage then this helpful ( actually unhelpful ) phrase really just grinds parents gears ! There are times in every parents day when you feel like you are the only person in the world going through this and can feel quite lonely , especially if you don’t have a tribe of amazing friends nearby or any family , I think this is why so many of us find comfort from “strangers” on the internet 😉 I have written many a time on Instagram about how I get “touched” out at the end of the day , I really do get a sensory overload from the long days of constantly having someone touch me , talk at me , follow me and lie on me , to some this may sound horrible and you may say I should be tbankful for what I have ( and I most definitely am thankful , more than you will actually ever know ) but I think all parents , when they are being truthful to themselves will actually feel this way . I often wonder if our moms ever felt like this , I have never heard any mom over the age of  45 say that they felt this way and I think that is why so many parents ( I would think mostly moms ?) feel / felt so alone and think that there is something wrong with them and they question their ability to parent . The more kids we have had the more intense it feels at times , you can have at least two kids crying at any one time , another one looking for food and another one pulling at your arm looking for your full attention , it can be so hard to divide your time and the guilt can be insane ! The same goes with how tired you both can be and the. you find yourself snapping at the the kids the good old guilt kicks in again .All this guilt and stresses of parenting can really feel all encompassing and you really do wonder if its just your house that is like a three ring circus , I think this is why so many parents like to follow parenting bloggers / vloggers , we like to feel that we are not alone and it so refreshing to see real life issues being spoken about rather than just staged beautiful pictures ! Parenting these days is so multi faceted and we face so many more challenges than our parents generation as the pressure to do it all and have it all is much more fierce , the expectation that we should have immaculate homes , hobbies , home cooked meals , work outside the home , look perfect , kids need a million activities , make costumes , attend matches , bake for cake sales , have huge Pinterest perfect parties , oh and I nearly forgot we also need to be able to do amazing crafts every day ( I will admit I do not mind that part 😉 ) All of these can place huge pressure on our mental health ( and I really do mean both partners – Dads mental health tends to be left out a lot ) so lets make a deal , from here on out lets just be honest about parenting and tell all , from the good , the bad and the down right ugly ! The good parts do in fairness out weigh the bad every time but sometimes it feels like the crappy days are never ending ( Spoiler .. they do end … eventually 😉 )

 

L xx

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